Journal Assignment 1: Satire

I have no idea why everyone is freaking out about this so called Coronavirus outbreak. The whole thing is obviously one giant hoax. People get sick all the time. In fact, according to WebMD, approxamately one billion people in the U.S. alone suffer from the common cold in just one year. To delve even deeper, just one child can have between six and ten colds in a year.

For all we know, this could just be a simple cold that happens to be effecting a large amount of people rather violently. These things happen. I mean, just look at the population of China (the largest in the whole world). They have approxamately 1.42 billion people living in that country. It’s bound to get a little crowded, so I bet germs are having the time of their lives over there, jumping from one human to another. They probably have twice as many common colds that we have here in the United States. Being sick is just a part of life, nothing to freak out about.

As a matter of fact, if I was Xi Jinping (the beloved president of China), I would be quite offended that other nations are limitting transportation and warning people not to come to China. I don’t see anything wrong with this virus, so I’d be openly inviting people to visit my wonderful country.

While all the wonderful tourists are here, It would be an amazing opportunity to remind them how safe the country is. I’d also make sure plenty of advertizments for fun things like Tiktok were on display everywhere you look. Definitely not to distract from the sickness that you may or may not aquire. If anything it would be so more people download the app and I can aquire their information through it.

Anyway, back to my main point. The Coronavirus! Really, I think people are just overreacting , and this whole thing will just blow over in no time. It will be like it never even happened.

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